Drinking... like I was back in the day

I NEVER drink, well not never, more like occassionaly at bar-b-que's to dull the sound of children screaming at the top of their lungs, a two drink max.

I learned all too quickly at my man's Christmas party, free booze, that having a hangover is a definite guarantee that those kids are going to wake up early, your going to be sick, and they are going to have one of those uncooperative days, where they just scream, like when your driving and can't stop, or they just Don't Wanny like Easty would say, all day long.

I never get drunk, anymore, well, maybe sometimes.

Sometimes when you have the opportunity, no kids the next morning and you really don't have to drive, and well you go overboard.

I seem to like to go overboard when I have a 5 1/2 hour flight home.

I was in Fredericton, with the McMom's entourage and well, the Grey Goose and tonics were, buy one shot, get the second one free, and we were done for the week. No getting up early to travel 2 hours to a the potato capital of the Canada and give interviews to the camera guys, who I torture with my ineptitude in front of the camera. I am sure they just want to smack me upside the head for apologizing for the tremedous amount of retakes as I can barely get out, It's our first day, and we are in Fredericton and on our way to the McCain potato facility. I could however recite most of Paul Revere from the Beastie Boys with the help our cameraman, luckily the new guy did not record it so it won't be shown anywhere except in my memory.

***It was a great experience, and you guys can visit the site mcdonaldsmoms.ca or urbanmoms.ca soon to see our adventures, videos, journals, and blogposts soon to come.***

As all the responsible Moms went to bed, and our young entourage retired, I was numb enough to well, stay up even later. Honestly, I never adjust to the time difference and being that I am a nightowl and don't go to sleep until midnight, my time, going to bed at 3am, seemed reasonable all week.

Except I wasn't drinking doubles until tonight.

I found myself outside talking to some local, yokel, Fredericton boys who just turned 21. One was showing his buddy and anyone who wanted to see, his so-called girlfriend in her red lingerie and some topless shots.


Notice the uncomfortable body language, uncertain look on our cameraman Adam.

He showed me, BIG mistake.

I started off all like, wow is that your girlfriend, and he was well kindof just some chick I am seeing. Then I slowly lured him into my lair, of interest and questioning. Before you know it I was asking him if he had a sister, or a girl cousin, or a girl that was just a close friend. No to all. I asked him if she would mind if you showed her pictures, he said probably, then I got all in his face and LECTURED HIM, like a Baptist priest on Sunday.

He ran screaming from me, not really, just left saying he thought I hated him. I must say that his friend didn't completely look like he disagreed with me, as he proceeded to tell us his room number and that they had booze.

Seriously girls, think twice, its so easy to forward pics onto anyone, especially the internet. Don't do it, just don't do it girls.

I had one of those moments, where I felt real good, then I thought, Damn, he was totally a wanna be gangster, all listening to his Eminem, for all I now he could've totally GAK'D me!

***To murder someone execution style, specifically in the back of the head or neck by gun or dagger. Used in a sentence: Foo' went straight up mad dog... He started reachin' fo my Big Mac so I gak'd the boy right there. What? he thought I would'nt gak a mofo? I ain't nobody's McBitch.. So I said "Hold these foo' and took out ma chrome an' put some gak in dat dome" Sheet, Not like I had no choice 'bout it"...***




I could see the headline, On a recent trip McMom Surrey-Vancouver was found shot, suspect stated she lectured me so much that I had to Gak her, to get her to shutup.

Disclaimer: I told the guy, Chase, I would take a picture of his licence so I could warn all the other girls out there about him.


The night ended with a bike ride in the lobby, all I am saying is that it wasn't me.